


Cold

by UmiAzuma



Category: Daredevil (Comics), Daredevil (TV), The Punisher (TV 2017)
Genre: Also the mug, Amy is a cinnamon roll, Frank has a cold, Frank is afraid of needles, Frank is grumpy, I did this instead of sleeping after taking my cold meds, M/M, World's Okayest Dad, also world's deadliest burrito, because anyone with a fully functioning brain is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-04
Updated: 2019-02-04
Packaged: 2019-10-22 04:19:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,694
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17655944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UmiAzuma/pseuds/UmiAzuma
Summary: It started with the snifflesorthat one story where Frank gets a cold and makes everyone suffer for it





	Cold

**Author's Note:**

  * For [TheVagabondBoy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheVagabondBoy/gifts).



It starts with the sniffles.

 

Frank fell head first in the river ( _ it was an accident, Matt, jeez. Hop off my dick, will ya? _ ) and had to walk, soaking wet, all the way back to Hell's Kitchen, in the cold night air.

 

Matt had told him he smelled like fish. Frank grumbled, then he grumbled some more when Matt offered a fluffy towel. He grumbled some more when Matt suggested a warm bath just in case because  _ no, Red, the Punisher does not get sick _ .

 

Three days later, he's sniffling and coughing and denying he is sick because he is  _ not _ sick, Matthew.

 

They're doing some recon on a warehouse. Dex had sent Matt an envelope with a bunch of papers that were as scattered as a bag of kittens and Matt spent ten minutes trying to figure them out because the kid didn't even think about sending a copy Matt could  _ read _ . So they're in this rooftop. Frank is looking through the scope of his weapon as Matt tries to listen.

 

Frank keeps turning around to sneeze and complain about the humidity. Matt sighs because he can't listen, Frank's sneezing is so loud.

 

“Why don't you just go home and rest? You're obviously not well, Frank.” Matt suggests as kindly as he can.

 

“I'm  _ fine _ Red, I just gottAAATCHOO!” Frank sniffles yet again. Matt jumps a little at the sneeze as Frank goes back to the scope, then gasps. “It's Billy! I fucking kne-AAAAAHHTCHOO!!”

 

“Frank go  _ home _ dammit!” Matt pulls on Frank’s ear and the man complains bitterly.

 

“It's Billy! I gotta-”

 

“You gotta take some cold meds and sleep! Go home or I'll drag you there myself!”

 

Frank refuses, so of course Matt has to make good on his promise to drag him back. He pulls on Frank until he manages to get him home and makes some of that ugly tea he always drinks to relax. Frank grumbles as Matt wraps him in a blanket, he grumbles as Matt takes his temperature and keeps grumbling as Matt calls Dex and tells him the situation. Frank can't hear the blond kid, but he can hear Matt say something about Fisk before falling asleep.

 

When he woke up a few hours later, his throat felt like sandpaper and his nose was completely blocked. He had to breathe through his mouth.

 

And Red was gone. The little traitor.

 

Frank left the house and went back to the warehouse and found Red and the yeeting kid in a nearby rooftop. Russo was taking his men somewhere, and apparently he had just had a meeting with Vanessa Fisk.

 

Frank had planned on sneaking on Matt and the kid, but as soon as he was close enough, his body betrayed him and he sneezed so loudly Dex squealed like a terrified rabbit. Matt yelped, the men outside the warehouse were suddenly very alert. Someone took Vanessa Fisk away on a car, as Billy Russo left in another one with his men. 

 

Red was not happy. The blond kid still looked like he'd had a small heart attack. 

 

“Frank I  _ told _ you to stay home! You're not well and now you ruined the whole operation!”

 

“Do you  _ always _ sneeze like that? Jesus!” Dex was still clutching his chest. 

 

“We're going home, you should do the same, Dex.” Red dragged Frank out of the rooftop, very careful not to meet any of Russo's men on the way. Dex went the other way. 

 

As soon as they were home, Matt called Curtis. The man complained that he wasn't that kind of doctor, but gave Matt the names of a few medicines. Frank complained bitterly that he didn't need meds, he was  _ fine _ , he had to go and pick up Amy from the bus station the next day. Matt said he'd do it, he'd pick up the meds and pick up Amy as well.

 

He wasn't expecting to meet Frank's kid like this, but he also wasn't expecting to buy meds for the Punisher because he had the sniffles.

 

Matt picked Amy up from the bus station first, introduced himself and Amy shrugged and said she already knew who he was, and refused to let Matt carry her backpack.

 

“You look like a light breeze could knock you over, no offense.”

 

“None taken. We need to get some meds for Frank.”

 

“Is he hurt? He's working?”

 

“No, he just has a cold and is being unbearable.”

 

“Sounds like Frank.” Amy said, and followed Matt to the nearest grocery store to find the meds.

 

Matt groaned, they were shots. Of course they were shots. He turned to Amy and asked her if she knew how to apply them, he could feel her shrug, then she grumbled an apology and said she didn't know how.

 

He couldn't call Curtis and ask him to do it, he was a busy man. Claire was in Cuba with her mother, away from all the crazy of New York (not by any fault of Matt's, mind you, Matt was innocent). Matt didn't know anyone else who could apply a shot to Frank.

 

“Karen?” Amy suggests carefully. Frank had told Matt that Karen and Amy had met. But Karen was busy with a case out of town with this guy she had started seeing and Matt didn't want to bother her with this. Both he and Frank had agreed that Karen was better off seeing someone who didn’t have the emotional baggage equivalent to a transatlantic flight capacity.

 

They got home and Frank was curled under the covers, hugging Loot. The stupid coyote took over the entire bed, Frank had his nose buried on his fur. Matt scared the big animal off and Amy yelped. Where the hell had Frank found a coyote?

 

Frank woke up a little confused, as Red sat next to him in bed and tried to tidy up his messy curls. He smiled a little at Amy, still wrapped in the covers like the world's deadliest burrito. 

 

“Hey kid…”

 

“Hey yourself.” She said, offering him a box. “I brought you something from Florida.”

 

The box had a mug in it, white and shiny, it had big, ugly, colorful letters that read ‘World's Okayest Dad’, and Frank snorts at it, then promptly has a coughing fit.

 

“How's Florida?” He asks after he's done coughing a lung. 

 

“Horrible, I came back to apply in Columbia for vet medicine.”

 

“Look at you, goin’ to college an’ all.”

 

“Yeah, I'm a grown human being now.”

 

“As a person who went to college, not even I am a grown human being.” Matt busied himself preparing the shot, he'd have to give it to Frank himself. He hopes he doesn't make a mistake and end up hurting Frank. “Okay, your shot is ready.”

 

“Shot? As in tequila shot?” Frank perked up a little, Amy snorted.

 

“You’d be lucky if it were a tequila shot, old man.” Amy helped Matt turn Frank around, and that's when he put two and two together.

 

“Oh no.” He said, getting up from the bed and almost knocking both Amy and Matt off of it. “None of you is giving me shots today!”

 

“Frank come on! You're sick! It's for your own good!” Matt held the syringe up and Frank paled.

 

“Give me pills or cough syrup or whatever, no shots!”

 

“You got shot in the ass once and didn't kick this much of a fuss!” Amy supplies helpfully. “I took a bullet out of your ass!”

 

“This is different!”

 

“It'll hurt less!” Amy grabs his arm and Frank snatches it away and leaves the room.

 

Matt and Amy chase him around the apartment for at least ten minutes. Until Matt crosses his arms in front of his chest and  _ glares _ at where he thinks Frank might be.

 

“If you don't sit still, I’m calling the big guns.”

 

Frank sits still for a moment, Amy can see him pale a little more and frowns, confused.

 

“You would  _ not _ .”

 

“You act like you don't know me, Frank.”

 

“I’m confused.” Amy says, looking at both of them.

 

“I'm calling my mother.”

 

“ _ No. _ ” Frank tries to snatch the phone away from Matt, as he struggles to speak to someone and smushes Frank's face away.

 

A good half hour later, a nun shows up. Amy is still very confused. The nun looks at Amy, she looks at Frank, and orders Matt to hold him.

 

Frank tries to escape. He really does. But Amy sits on him and grabs his hands, as Matt holds his legs in place. It all happens fast enough that Frank only feels a little pinch. The medicine going into his body is what hurts the most. Once they're done, the nun helps Frank back to bed, as he wipes his wet face and grumbles under the blankets, looking miserable. 

 

The nun, who introduced herself to Amy as Sister Maggie, dragged the girl to the living room as Matt pets Frank gently and reassures him that it's for his own good.

 

“You'll have to hogtie that man tomorrow, I am not coming back. He's as terrible a patient as Matthew.”

 

Frank fell asleep after the shot, woke up a few hours later, then went right back to sleep after eating one bowl of rice soup. 

 

The next day, Amy suggested zip ties and Frank almost cries at the irony of the situation.

 

“Your decisions have literally come back to bite you in the ass, old man.” Amy cackled maniacally as Matt distracted Frank with something, anything, so he didn’t notice he was going to get the meds applied.

 

He did notice, but it was too late, and by the time Matt was done, Frank was sobbing like a child, begging to please be free from this misery.

 

“You’ll be right as rain before you know it, Frank.” Matt kissed his forehead and Amy cooed at them, as soon as Frank was free from the zip ties he glared at her and then at the mug she’d gifted him.

 

He didn’t have the heart to break it or say anything to her.

 

He was, indeed, right as rain in three days. Matt looked very smug about it.


End file.
